One year after we last met with the survivors featured in “The Men Who Killed Me,” co-editor Anne-Marie de Brouwer returned to Kigali in July 2009 and met with 15 of the 17 survivors featured in the book.
There, Anne-Marie distributed English and Kinyarwanda versions of “The Men Who Killed Me” (the Kinyarwanda version to be used as a counselling tool for survivors of sexual violence), shared with the survivors the results of our book production and promotion efforts and learned more about how the process of producing the book had affected each survivor. We also learned how the sponsorships allocated to the survivors from the book’s proceeds via Foundation Mukomeze changed their lives.
The survivors were very happy with the fact that their stories had been published and many felt their lives had changed for the better since their involvement with the book. According to Marie Louise, “I couldn’t smile before, but I have found comfort by taking part in this book project. I now experience a lot of joy. It is miraculous how sharing my testimonial with the world has changed my life.” And Jeannette said, “I enjoy life more; the proceeds from the book have allowed me to go back to school. Soon, I will be able to properly take care of my family again.” Although all the survivors Anne-Marie met were happy with how the proceeds from the book’s sales had positively impacted on their lives, they all expressed their hope that their testimonials would also contribute to the recognition, prevention and punishment of sexual violence in other parts of the world.
Jean Gakwandi, the director of Solace Ministries, the grassroots organisation that supports all survivors featured in the book, began the meeting by expressing his appreciation for all the work done and highlighted the importance of fostering global awareness of the book’s topic — sexual violence in conflict. Anne-Marie explained to all the survivors the process of producing the book since we last met in July of 2008, including the editorial and publication process, and described the media attention the book and photo-exhibitions garnered in Canada, the Netherlands and other countries. She also explained how the book has had a significant impact on those who heard and read the survivors’ testimonials.
All 17 survivors of sexual violence portrayed in the book have led difficult lives since the genocide: some continue to live in poverty and are unable to properly care for themselves, their children or other family members; many still suffer psychological trauma and physical pain, such as headaches and stomach aches, that are a result of the crimes they experienced during the genocide; and a number continue to be stigmatized and isolated by community members. Yet, the process of sharing their experiences of sexual violence during the genocide for “The Men Who Killed Me” was viewed by many as a positive undertaking and part of their healing process. The survivors felt proud seeing the results of their contribution to the book; some indicated that they would ask others to read the book for them because they could not read the English text themselves, and the photos added another dimension of interest for the survivors.
In spite of their ongoing hardships, many survivors’ lives have changed for the better since July 2008:
***
Marie Louise had not been able to laugh after the genocide. Because she wept so often, some thought she was suffering from mental illness. Today, with sponsorship money (derived from the book’s proceeds), Marie Louise has been able to pay for the construction of a new kitchen behind her house and buy clothing for herself and her children as well as a hoe to cultivate her land. According to Alice, the social worker at Solace Ministries, Marie Louise has changed significantly since she started receiving her sponsorship; she can smile again and takes good care of herself and her children.
***
Jeannette returned to school to study restaurant management, is able to pay for transport fees, and can pay for her children’s school fees. She is also active in her community as a health counsellor and acts as a watchdog for the police to ensure the safety of her community. In this way, Jeanette feels she is contributing to, and is a part of, society again.
***
With her sponsorship, Immaculée has been able to buy milk, pay for the bus, and buy glasses to prevent reoccurring headaches that are the result of blows to her head during the genocide. Immaculée has also been appointed a judge in gacaca. She was also able to sue her husband in court for selling all of their marital property after he chose not to acknowledge their marriage any longer.
***
For Marie Claire, sponsorship money prevented her from being evicted from her house because she wasn’t able to afford her rent anymore. Marie Claire had worked at a coffee company close to her home, but was forced to terminate her employment because she was constantly ill–a result of her HIV infection.
***
Both Françoise Mukeshimana and Hyacintha bought small plots of land where they cultivate produce, such as cassava and sorghum. Profits from sales of the produce they grow enabled them both to buy bricks to build new houses and to earn an income.
***
Ernestine was able to cultivate cassava and sorghum, which she sells for a profit to earn an income. With her additional income, she has been able to pay for her children’s school fees.
***
With her sponsorship, Adela has been able to buy clothing for herself and her children and can also afford to pay for her children’s school fees. Though she continues to suffer from headaches that are a consequence of the violence she experienced during the genocide, Adela dreams of starting a business with her son selling second-hand shoes.
***
Pascasie’s sponsorship enabled her to buy beans and skin cream, as well as three goats whose milk she can sell. With future support, she hopes to start a small business selling second-hand clothing at the market.
***
Faustin, the only man in the book, explained how he finally developed the courage to return to school. He wishes to become a medical doctor and to help others in the same manner he is receiving help through the book’s proceeds. Faustin was also able to buy a cow which will assist him with his farming. With a future sponsorship, he would like to rebuild his house, which is in need of dire repair.
***
Clementine explained that the sponsorship enabled her to start a small business selling food in the quarter where she lives. This past year has been difficult, though, for she separated from her husband whom she had only recently married. Clementine had married her husband out of loneliness and later realized that she was not ready to be intimate with him.
***
For Marie Jeanne, the sponsorship made it possible for her to renovate her house with a new cement floor and new chairs. However, Marie Jeanne and her children continue to be rejected by their community because of her HIV status. The chief of the quarter where Marie Jeanne lives–who is also HIV-positive–is now helping her by instructing the community not to harass those who are HIV-positive. Unfortunately, stigma related to HIV status is still a major issue that needs to be tackled in Rwanda, and is compounded by the fact that survivors and perpetrators of the genocide are often forced (in a small country such as Rwanda) to live side by side.
***
After trying several different kinds of HIV medication, Françoise Kayitesi continues to experience health problems. Because medication is not working for her, she feels very weak and it is challenging for her to earn an income.
***
Beatrice spent her sponsorship grant on her brother who is suffering from severe trauma due to the genocide. Beatrice’s own health situation has deteriorated because she had been working too hard making bread to earn a living, so she has decided to rest and recuperate on her doctor’s advice. Luckily, Beatrice doesn’t experience any negative effects from the HIV medication she is taking. While her bicycle and money were recently stolen from her house, the thief was caught. Beatrice expressed her hope that one day she would be safe.
***
From the support she received, Gloriose started a small business selling nuts, tomatoes and onions. Slowly, things are improving. She is now able to buy clothes and candies for her children, something she wasn’t able to afford prior to the sponsorship. Gloriose has also gained weight, though she still weighs only 40 kilos. Her housing situation is not ideal, for she lives in one room with her children and shares the house with four other women and eight children. The rent is being paid by a church, but Gloriose doesn’t feel at ease in her house, and the community in which she lives continues to reject her. She does not own any kitchen materials, but recently was able to buy a mattress, which made her happy.
***
For more information about Foundation Mukomeze, a Dutch charity that supports women and girls raped during the Rwandan genocide through its partner Solace Ministries: www.mukomeze.nl/eng
For a link to photos from the meeting, click here.
